You have every right to enjoy yourself in your apartment; however, so does your roommate. Conflicts can arise over differences in lifestyle compatibility. Characteristics and traits that are amusing or tolerable on a casual basis may not be so on an everyday basis. While all roommate relationships will have conflict at one time or another, it is important to determine those areas that are most important to you and in which you are not willing to compromise.
Here are some areas that require discussion before becoming roommates:
道德
It is best to find a roommate somewhat similar to yourself on these issues. 关于过夜客人的问题, 喝酒, 不敬的言语, persons of different race/nationality/religion/sexual orientation, 等.,应该讨论。. Will differences not only be tolerated but be respected?
清洁
One person's untidiness is another person's filth. 你对干净的定义是什么? How often and to what level of cleanliness is expected to be performed and by whom?
作为朋友的室友
Are you interested in a roommate only in regards to the living arrangements or do you want to have a social companion? No matter how well you get along with each other, there will be times when each of will prefer not to be in the other's company. You need to be able to recognize and discuss these times honestly.
解决冲突
How each of you handles the difficult situations, 分歧, and annoyances will best determine how well you will live together. Develop a scenario of conflict and ask how each would respond to it. Ask your potential roommate how he/she has handled problems in an interpersonal relationship.
宠物、儿童和访客
What is the expectation of quiet time and privacy? How often, if at all, will your roommate or you be bringing others in to the household? Will any of the above be left unattended or become the responsibility of the other.
睡眠模式和时间表
Are you a night owl or is your motto "early to bed, early to rise"? Discussions regarding personal quiet and study times as well as school and work schedules are imperative.
烹饪与食物
If the food items and/or cooking are to be shared, you need to determine the food preferences and habits of each other. 素食者或肉食者? 如果它是分开的, you need to set boundaries in regards to the storing and borrowing of food items as well as kitchen respect.
作为室友的你
One of the most important areas to explore is how you see yourself as a roommate. Are you really as neat and tidy as you think you are? 诚实地面对自己, 你的好恶, 你能容忍什么,不能容忍什么.
相信自己的直觉!
Roommate Compatibility and Other Pertinent Questions
These questions can be used as a discussion tool to help you explore your similarities and dissimilarities and in no way guarantees a match between you and your future roommate(s). It is imperative that roommates be able talk about any differences. 在任何室友生活关系中, 人和情况可能会改变, and further discussions may need to be held periodically throughout the year.
你的专业和年级是什么? 你要修几门课? Are you taking courses online, and do you require quiet time to take the class? 你工作吗?什么时候工作?
我们将如何分摊/支付账单? 你的其他财务义务是什么? What will we do if one of us cannot pay a bill on time as expected? 你有租客保险吗?
Do you any allergies or medical conditions of which I need to be aware? 你吃什么药? What will I need to do or whom do I contact in case of your medical emergency?
How many hours/day do you spend studying at home? 在另一个地方? Do you need silence or do you prefer music or television as background noise?
你喜欢什么样的音乐? 你播放音乐的声音有多大,多久播放一次? What television programs and movies do you like?
你抽烟吗?? 如果是,多少钱? 你的客人来访时吸烟吗?
你喝酒吗?? 如果有,次数和频率? 你不赞成那些喝酒的人吗? 你的客人来访时会喝酒吗?
你赞成吸毒吗? 你吸毒吗?? 你的客人来访时会吸毒吗?
你喜欢聚会吗? 你喜欢开派对吗? 多久来一次,有多少客人?
Do you mind if roommates have visitors and overnight guests? How long is the maximum acceptable time in which guests can stay? 你有另一半吗? 你养宠物吗??
What is your definition of neat, messy, clean and dirty? 我们如何分配清洁责任? 你会回收吗??
What's you policy on sharing or use of the other's property? 如果物品/财产损坏怎么办?
当你生气的时候,你通常会做什么? 你会把它说出来,避免冲突,还是大喊大叫?
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